Like many women I know, I was brought up unprepared for the challenges of motherhood. In return, I did not seek after it with much enthusiasm. I was afraid of what might happen if I were to bring children into the world because I was filled with anger and bitterness from my own childhood. Every child longs for love, acceptance, comfort, and approval and I am no different. When these needs are unmet, a child/young adult will seek to have them met in things such as drugs, sex, control, money, success, or unhealthy relationships. Thankfully, I encountered the only person who could give me unconditional and perfect love, acceptance, comfort and approval and that was Jesus Christ. He gives freely and without any strings attached. His redemptive love rescued me on February 25, 1987 when my husband, Jon, and I together accepted Christ. I received exactly what I needed to begin the journey of motherhood as I was given the Holy Spirit to teach and guide me (John 14:26; 16:13). In time I forgave my parents as it did me no good to harbor bitterness or resentment toward them. Dr. Kevin Leman says, “Forgiving is not saying what happened was okay and it’s not excusing it, but it is allowing something new to grow.” Today I am able to celebrate new beginnings.
2 Corinthians 5:17 (CEV) Anyone who belongs to Christ is a new person. The past is forgotten, and everything is new.
How exciting my past need not limit my ability nor yours to be a godly mother, that’s the beauty of the Christian life. You may not be able to change your past, however, by being proactive you can change the legacy you leave. Recently my mother praised me saying, “Cherie, I’ve turned you away from me; just like my mother did to me. I wish I could have broken the cycle before it affected you and your sister. I’m grateful that you have not continued the same cycle with your daughters; this makes me really proud. Maybe it will end with you? ” Sadly, her choices limited our relationship for many years. I celebrate that my choices are to build relationships with my daughters and leave a better legacy. I in no way can take credit for the changes that have occurred in my life. In my weaknesses, God is strong. Instead of facing inadequacies alone, I have learned that, “My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth” (Psalm 121:2). Where we may feel ill equipped, God is there to be our strength. After all, like the old adage goes, “God doesn’t call the equipped, He equips the called.” God’s word is a critical tool in preparing us for our calling as mothers. I chose to be in God’s word, study it, meditate on it and live it out. More importantly seeking and desiring an intimate relationship with my Maker broke so many chains as I discovered who I was in Him verses my family of origin, In Christ my life has purpose and meaning. I celebrate that God’s word gives direction and as we are faithful to follow Him, we hope our children too, will follow in our footsteps thus breaking the bondage of generational sins. Psalm 119:105
I purposed to be a mother based on biblical principles instead of social norms or past experiences. This choice lead me on a journey completely different than I ever experienced or envisioned. Along the journey, God placed spiritual parents in my life to help strengthen and teach me as I traveled the journey of motherhood. I am thankful for these amazing individuals that discipled me by investing in my life personally. When I was unable to find encouragement face to face I realized it could be found through books, conferences, and classes for a season. The point is you want to grow and thrive in your relationship with Christ by replacing wrong thinking with truth. I was challenged to stop complaining about what I didn’t have, but instead shape my legacy with what I did have via a mission statement asking what do I wish to pass on to my children? I celebrate that with God all things are possible even leaving a godly legacy. Matthew 19:26 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”
Being a mother has been one of the greatest joys in my life, certainly one worth celebrating. I am in awe that my two eldest daughters have both graduated from college and are living amazing lives that are bringing glory to God as they seek to serve Him. I am so proud of them. They are obedient and respectful of others and us. They challenge me with their walk and love for God. They have been some of the best teachers in my life. My youngest daughter continues to grow and mature as I seek to lay a solid biblical foundation for her by making sure she knows and loves the Lord. My greatest joy is knowing that my children are walking in the truth and following Jesus with their whole hearts which is biblical (2 John 1:4). What more could I want as a mother? I celebrate motherhood and the three precious gifts that God blessed me with, as children indeed are a gift from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward. Psalm 127
Oh I have so much to celebrate as I was given the opportunity to be a mother and, together with Jon, we have raised a godly heritage. I see the fruit of our labor and celebrate that with God all things are possible even for a reluctant mother like I was. My hope is to encourage those traveling the journey of motherhood feeling ill equipped.
As a mother what desires do you have for your children? Read 2 John 1:4, “It has given me great joy to find some of your children walking in the truth, just as the Father commanded us.” What can you purpose to do that would set your children on the right path to walk in truth?